ongoing cycle of misery - oh how that describes me perfectly now, HA HA. Thank you so much for the reply. I'll try getting an appointment asap. You say to keep on doing everything as normal, but would you suggest to force myself to do things? Like, force myself to go to my martial arts class even though the thought of going out makes me cry and lie down and drown in my pool of sadness? Very poetic, hah, but I feel like that somehow.
Yes. Not only would that get you back to your regular routine, but exercise = endorphins = happiness. If you don’t go, in the long run, you are going to wish you had. Trust me!
thank you for your reply under yoga's post. I think I'm going to have to see someone. The problem is, I've really lost interest in everything. Nothing brings me joy, there's always a looming perspective of something nasty and depressing. The only thing that makes me moderately happy is playing with my pet rat. :( but I only have a few hours daily for that, schoolwork kills me.
I definitely know how you feel. Years ago I moved across the country to be with the person that I was with at the time. I remember for a long time it took everything out of me. I was miserable, he was miserable because I was miserable, and it just became an ongoing cycle of… Misery. The relationship I had with this person was doomed from the start because I was just so unhappy with everything. It sounds like you really love your boyfriend and I would hate to see that you feeling this way because of one reason or another ruin your relationship. Go see someone who can help. In the meantime, keep living your life as you would normally, go out, have fun, and find yourself again. I found that taking joy in the little things helped me pull through my rut. Hang in there! And if you ever need someone to talk to, you have a whole community here. :)